All I heard was “get off the road, you stupid, road hogging, gay, retard”, as another fat SUV driving slob came within a few inches of my left shoulder as he pinned me between his right side mirror and the parked cars.

And even less surprising was the fact it was the third time within 35 minutes of riding. You gotta love riding in Los Angeles, or do you.

I love cycling. I HATE RIDING IN LOS ANGELES!

My own un-scientific study shows that riding in Los Angeles is getting more dangerous every year. And I have no idea what we can do about it.

So hear this, ALL YOU IMPATIENT DRIVERS IN LA – if you keep screaming at me to move over, I am going to start to listen.

I AM GOING TO MOVE OVER INTO THE RIGHT HAND LANE AND STAY THERE. And I am going to ride at a speed that will not only slow you up. but piss you off even more. No more riding in the make believe bike lane.

That is right.

I am going to go out of my way to PISS YOU OFF.

So enjoy starring at my lycra clad ass, because you are going to be looking at it for a while why you fight your way to the next fast food drive through.